My mind has been rolling and boiling over with thoughts, questions, memories, prayers and ideas. I'm everywhere but mostly nowhere.
I feel like I'm standing at the bottom of a spinning funnel, untouched, but completely distracted by everything spinning around and in front of me.
Here are some of the bits and pieces flying around.
Farmer Boy's new business venture and the financial unknown that comes with it.
Children that are growing up or grown up and living their own lives complete with struggle and frustration. Should I help? Should I speak? It's probably best to zip my lip and sit on my hands.
That's not easy.
Time on my hands as a result of growing/grown kids and all the questions that come with it. Am I doing enough? What should I be doing? What comes next? Should I be looking for what comes next or should I just sit still and let things be?
It's life in transition.
It's not new. I've actually been here for a while and feel like I should be settling in and getting comfortable but, nope, not happening.
It still can be excruciating, disorienting, frustrating, confusing and a little exciting.
I heard these words on the radio yesterday.
"God has promised to supply all our needs.
What we don't have now, we don't need now."
Good words don't you think?
So bear with me while I review what I actually do have.
Maybe you should grab a pen and a piece of paper and write down a list of what you have. We can do this together.
I have three grown/growing children.
But wait there's more. I have three tremendously awesome, hard-working, brave and unique children.
I have a hard-working, loving husband who would die for me if it came to it.
I have a family back home who is always there and who welcome me home with open arms.
I have spectacular friends.
I have an eternal God who is my refuge and whose arms are underneath it all.
I know the struggle is real.
But I'm shooting up a quick prayer of thanks for having everything I need.
Just for today. We'll take a step of faith together. Maybe it's a bit less frightening that way.