Friday, February 22, 2013

I Have No Idea

The snow was supposed to keep falling until noon today. I got things situated at work yesterday so I wouldn't have to go in today, thinking that the kids would be home from school all day. I was looking forward to a snow day. It's been a busy week and the thought of sleeping in until whenever, wearing my jammies until whenever, reading a book just because, watching a movie,  and simply being at home not worrying about being somewhere doing something sounded wonderful.

The snow came but not like they thought it would. School was only delayed two hours. Two hours was good, but I wanted the whole day. I didn't want to be cheated. Regardless of the botched weather forecast, I decided to get the full snow day experience.

I didn't get out of my jammies until 1:00 pm.

I ate potato chips for lunch.

I didn't exercise.

I tried to read my Bible and pray, but I fell asleep, and upon waking, I stumbled into the bathroom and my reflection revealed my shame. Upon closer examination, the unknown thing smashed into my check wasn't a zit. It was crumbs. Potato chip crumbs.

At that point I should have hopped into the shower and got on with things. The thought did cross my mind but then I sat down and watched Alias for, well...for a while. I may have even re-watched some Sydney and Vaughn parts that I like particularly well.

So as I sit here now, showered and having thoughts about making supper, I'm faced with a slight dilemma. I believe myself to be a disciplined, well ordered, and productive woman. I exercise five or six days a week. I plan weekly menus. I keep a clean house. I try to eat healthy. Apparently, I also allow potato chips to get imbedded in my cheek. This fact forces me to stop and face the me I've been today. Who am I today? What do I do with this woman? Embrace her and whisper, "It's about time you showed up, I couldn't keep this up much longer", or do I scold her?

I have no idea.

Before 40, I don't know that I ever had days like this.

Am I  like a good wine, mellowing with age or am I losing my edge?

I have no idea.

At 2:00 pm I had showered and convinced myself to go get some groceries. As I was gazing at canned tomatoes trying to remember why I needed canned tomatoes, a woman who was obviously in a rush came up behind me. I was in her way. She was a lot younger than me. She had places to be and probably many things to do. I smiled at her, quickly got out of her way, and watched her snatch her tomatoes and run down the aisle to her next conquest.

The smile stayed on my face as I continued to watch her go. I thought about the day I was having. I thought about all the things I probably should have done today. I figured 'hurried grocery store woman' probably didn't have the same run in with potato chips that I'd had. I figured 'hurried grocery store woman' hadn't been watching episodes of Alias at 10:30 in the morning. She probably didn't have her jammies on until 1:00pm. Yet there I was smiling, and off she went with a scowl and a list.

So what's the moral of the story?

If the chance to go slow presents itself, grab it? Pray for snow days every Friday, just don't fall asleep while praying after you've consumed a lot of potato chips?  Work as hard as you are able, but don't forget to take a snow day every once in a while? Don't buy potato chips because if they're not in the house you can't eat them? Smile at other women in the grocery store? Finish watching Alias on Netflix so you can rejoin the rest of productive society?

I have no idea.

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